28
Ways To Know If You Are Chinese Dennis
- September 4, 2002
You unwrap gifts
very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially
those bows).
When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them
in your closet or in the bedroom of an
adult child who has
moved out.
You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.
You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers. You use the
grocery bags to hold garbage.
You hate to waste food
Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw
away the leftovers on the table, you'll
finish them. Your mom will give a lecture about starving kids in
Africa.
You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one
leftover chicken wing.
You don't own any real Tupperware, only a cupboard full of used but
carefully rinsed margarine tubs, take out
containers, and jam
jars.
You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every
time you stay in a hotel.
You wipe your plate and utensils or wash them in a small basin of hot
water before you eat every time you go
to a restaurant.
You own a rice cooker and a slow cooker.
You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
You fight (literally) over who pays the dinner bill.
You have a teacup with a cover on it.
If you're under age 20, you own a really expensive Walkman; If you're
over 20, you own a really expensive
camera.
You're a wok user.
You only make long distance calls after 7 pm.
You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached - it
means they're fresh.
You never call your parents just to say hi.
If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they'll ask if
you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
Your parents tell you to boil herbs and stay inside when you get sick.
They also tell you not to
eat fried foods or baked goods because they're heaty (yeet hay in
Cantonese).
You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only sit 10
feet apart.
You always cook too much.
You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last
piece of food on the table.
You starve yourself before going to all you can eat buffet.
You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or
electronics, computers.
You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper - thin.
You know why this list consists of only "28" reasons.
You take this message and forward it to all your Chinese friends.
So,
if you are a Chinese. Keep it up guys!!!! 'coz not everybody can be
Chinese.
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